After 7 years of living with the locals on Deep Space Nine, we all came to know it pretty well. We spent hours in Ops, popped by Garak’s Clothiers to watch some suits get altered and information traded, and spent so much time at Quarks that we even got to know some of the dabo girls by name. The Promenade is a busy, vibrant place with many people wandering around on their daily shopping excursions. But how much do we really know about it?

There are many shops we never got to visit at all, and we can only guess what went on at some of them. Even the names of them are little-known amongst the fans. It’s a shame, since the art department of the show had gone to great lengths not only to make it look good, but also to put in some creative in-jokes. So let’s take a look at some of these lesser-known shops and see just what we missed out on…

1)Milliways: Yes, that’s right, Milliways. Clearly the influence of Douglas Adams’s writing is legendary, but could it have really reached Bajor? Absolutely. This restaurant at the end of the universe is THE place to be if you’ve done six impossible things this morning and need a filling lunch. No doubt the restaurant has an amazing view of the wormhole, and if you wait long enough then you may even catch the end of all existence as you know it.

2)Tom Servo’s Used Robots: It’s a tragic misconception that Trekaholics lack a sense of humour. Dammit, we’re human beings, not Vulcans. We don’t see too many robots hanging around in Star Trek, despite the technology clearly existing. However, if you wanted one then who better to sell you one than Mystery Science Theater 3000’s Tom Servo? This wise-cracking heckler of bad old B-grade films who made many sarcastic comments over the years at Trek and Shatner has a place of Honour on DS9.

3)Pancho’s Happy Bottom Riding Club: Okay, this one isn’t what you think. Or maybe it is, depending on how your mind works. It’s a recreational club and “dude ranch” for pilots who want a good steak dinner and a dip in a pool after a hard day, at least if history is anything to go on. In real life, it was a ranch near Muroc Air Force Base that Chuck Yeager and others used to visit, and features in The Right Stuff. But damn, that name…

4)Yoyodyne Propulsion Systems: THE place to go for all your engine needs, Yoyodyne has featured in both V and cult film The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension. Yoyodyne logos have actually been seen all over the Star Trek universe, on consoles and panels. While you may not have noticed them, Yoyodyne clearly plays a big part in keeping Starfleet on the move, although we bet they’re probably also the same guys who built that defective hatch that caused the explosion on the Enterprise in The Drumhead.

5)Bowling Alley: A bowling Alley? Really?! Well, maybe some of the kids go there, or those crew members who aren’t interested in Quark’s pub offerings of a pint and a game of darts. It’s bizarre to think that bowling is still so popular that if Sisko hadn’t known baseball, he’d have had to explain linear time to the wormhole aliens by rolling a ball at some skittles.

6)Sirius Cybernetics Corporation: Another Douglas Adams reference, they make everything from artificial intelligence doors through to “your plastic pal who’s fun to be with”-style robots. Given Data’s problems with that pesky emotion chip over the years, all we can hope for is that they haven’t developed the GPP feature yet. That stands for Genuine People Personality. Trust us, seeing their other attempts we’re all better off without it.

7)Diva Droid Corporation: Contrary to what the name suggests, they don’t just make robotic ladies for whatever savoury reasons you can imagine, this company creates male robots too. Well, it’s questionable whether droids are male or female anyway, but we’ll assume they are. If the company name sounds familiar, it’s from Red Dwarf. They’re the firm that made Kryten and promote the concept of Silicon Heaven, especially prominent in the episode The Last Day. That’s the episode in which Lister states, “Don’t give me that Star Trek crap, it’s too early in the morning.”

8)Forbin Project: This is one of those businesses that it’s best not asking about. The business name is a reference to the cult sci-fi film Colossus: The Forbin Project about a military supercomputer that gains self-awareness and takes over the world. Now we’re not saying that the proprietor of this shop is up to no good, but after countless failures by the DS9 computers that have triggered everything from glitches in the replicators to holodeck malfunctions, we think it’s a little sloppy of Odo not to investigate this guy first instead of Quark.

9)Jupiter Mining Corporation: Another reference to sci-fi comedy show Red Dwarf, they were the interstellar mining company that owned Red Dwarf itself and employed the main characters Lister and Rimmer. What they’re up to in the Star Trek timeline we can only guess at, but it’s nice to know that at some point there could have been the strangest Star Trek crossover since Kirk and the gang met the X-Men. Also, the weird parallel between the shows is that in the dismal Red Dwarf USA, Terry Farrell played Cat.

10)Banzai Institute: Yes, it’s another Buckaroo Banzai reference. Buckaroo himself was a multi-talented guy, being a top neurosurgeon, rock star, particle physicist, race car driver, and the last hope for humanity. We don’t know what skills the Institute teaches, but any or all of the ones listed here are likely except for the last. If the wormhole aliens had met him, they may have been impressed, but we all know that Sisko was the perfect fit. Business at the institute since the Emissary showed up probably dropped off a bit…